The Nightmare Before Christmas.  A work of twisted genius.

Goatees - yes please!  Revd T has one and he is not allowed to shave it off ever because I have never seen him without it and it would be weird!

What I forgot to explain through all of this is that you can go through all of this, but you only get Ordained if a church calls you to be their minister.  I’m fuzzy about how it all works, but although all the training etc is part of the call, the final confirmation is a church calling you to be their Minister.  No call, no ordination. 
 
Mr T had his Induction Service last week and is now officially the Minister at the church.  He can call himself Revd, describe himself as a “Minister of Religion” on forms and his name is on the notice board outside the church. 
 
Our church is teeny, tiny – 20 or so members, plus others who come regularly.  We pray that we’ll grow and hope for the best.  And we give thanks for the Baptist Home Mission grant that enabled them to call Mr T as a full time Minister.  
 
We move into the Manse next week.  Let the packing commence!

Thank you for all the good wishes in response to yesterday’s entry.  What I didn’t add is that the whole process is extremely stressful and worrying.  You know you’re going to end up doing something, somewhere … But until you’ve gone through Settlement, you don’t know what the thing or the somewhere is going to be!  Mr T wasn’t that stressed about the whole process … I did that!  So glad this bit of the process is over.

Right, where to start ... Bear with me, this is going to take a while …

Mr T started his final year at Bible College last September. As well as studying and church work, the final year brings Settlement. ie: Finding Mr T and everyone else in his year suitable church related employment.

Ministerial posts are as scarce. In previous years, there were several full time vacancies per student but now it’s one per student.  Students were also encouraged to look at part time / non-stipendiary posts as well. [ETA:  This is a change in stance as when Mr T asked about part-time three years ago, he was told they didn't like ministers straight out of college to do that].   I’ve no idea if the ratio quoted only includes suitable full time posts or if it took into account students called to their placement church / doing missionary service abroad.  It didn’t include ministers looking to move from one church to another. Add those in and it's more like three people per vacant post).

The Settlement process is a bit like a dating agency ... Mr T wrote a profile outlining his church background, experience etc and the college Principal gave a reference. We also stated any particular preferences. The more of those you have, the harder it is to match you so we went for "within commutable distance of Mrs T's work". (Mrs T likes her job and wants to keep it).  The churches also wrote a profile with a description of themselves and the kind of things they’re looking for in a Minister. 

The Settlement Committee meets once a month, prays though the lists and passes the profiles of people they think might be suitable to the church.  I am informed that they do not put the names into two hats, pray over them, do a FIFA style draw and then go to the pub. 

If the church wants to take it further, they invite you to an interview with the Deacons / Leadership.  This is followed by an invitation to come and Preach with a Squint.  (ie:  Lead a whole service).  This allows everyone to have a look at each other without actually committing to anything further.  The church then meets and asks you to come and Preach With A View.  This is the biggie.  Same again, only followed by a Q&A with the whole church.  (Sort of like a panel interview, with a really big panel!).  The church then meets again to discuss and vote.  If they think it’s right, they call you to be the Minister of that church.  If they don’t, then both of you start the whole process again with someone / someplace else.

Mr T’s name was commended for assistant and sole pastor to a few churches - large and small. Some came back if they weren't interested, but others didn't. (Larger churches were worse about this than the smaller ones, funnily enough). He also had a few interviews that didn't come to anything and then it all got a bit serious ... Names of the churches withheld for obvious reasons.

Church A is a small to medium sized, multicultural church in the innerish city. (Bonus points from the Principal!). They wanted to fill a part time post with a housing allowance.  (No manse).  Mr T got as far as the preach with a view stage, but they didn’t feel he was the right person for them.  We were gutted. They've since found a more experienced minister with a house elsewhere who's happy to commute so it all worked out in the end.

Church B is a moderately sized church in a lovely part of the world. The congregation were really friendly, welcoming and totally up for it.  But I would have been the only person under Forty-mumble and the Tubblet the only child.  They also loved their hymns and traditional worship.  Mr T loves these things too, only not so much.  He also likes to sing the odd chorus and has been known to wave his arms in the air.  Mr T went to preach with a squint, but having gone there, we knew – sadly - that it wasn’t the right place for us.  (Mr T would have been rocking under the pulpit, clutching a bottle of Jack Daniels three months in).  Not sure if they’ve found anyone yet, but hopefully it’ll be someone who loves them is able to respect and support their spiritual identity.

Church C is a small church in a Very Big village with an all age and cultures congregation.  Mr T had been there to preach a few times as it is fairly near to where we are now.  One Sunday during the summer when he went to lead a service, I had a moment and suggested that as they were looking for a minister and he was looking for a church, it was worth having a conversation … Even if it didn’t come to anything in the end. 

The church agreed with me and we went straight to the preach with a view as he’d been there before.  He led a service, followed by a wonderful pot luck lunch where we chatted with the congregation.  A week later, the church meeting called Mr T unanimously.  [ETA:  He now does a probationary period of three years, has to do some further study and has a mentor etc.  At the end of the 3 years, he is welcomed as a fully acredited minister with a handshake at Baptist Conference]. 

The ordination is at the end of September.  The induction is at the beginning of October … We’ll move at some point in October.  It’s 10 minutes down the road from where we are now so the Tubblet can stay at her school.  Next stage of the adventure begins …

He got a 2:1 btw.

If I was allowed to add fictional characters to the list, I’d ask Mr Thornton that question.  That would put an end to the thread that I can’t bring myself to post on, but still haven’t managed to stop reading …

Went into Boots last night to purchase some 3 for 2 skincare and got talking to a lovely salesman from Organic Surge about Parabens and their effects and why going organic is A Good Thing.  I didn’t have the heart to tell him that – wild generalisation alert! – many of us would risk the nasty evil ingredients if they really did half the things they claimed and really restored the bloom of youth.  (I’ve given up on the bloom of youth and am now hoping for not bad for her age!  I'm too poor and wussy for surgery or injections).